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Monday, June 4, 2012


Seriously Why am I always so sentimental….. Before I had kids I did not even cry at movies, in fact there used to be this show on TV called Touched by an Angel it came on Sunday nights and my dad LOVED it never missed it. It always struck me as odd because my dad although we drug him to church and he was an Easter and Christmas Catholic he was never really religious… never talked about God or praying.

But he always watched this show…. Most of them were as you know sad because it was about someone who had passed or was sick. There was this particular episode that I watched with him the only one I saw him cry at. It was about a dad who had Cancer and was dying. The night before he actually went to be with Jesus he went into to each of his three children’s rooms to say goodbye to them. Seriously was HEART BREAKING. My dad the man who I had seen cry only twice before this when his mother died and with my great grandma died. I looked over at him with tears in my own eyes and he was weeping. That is when I really lost it….

But other than that instance I never cried really well EVER, I remember seeing my mom cry about a book or a movie and I would laugh and say but mom you don’t even know those people you are reading about or they are not real it is just a movie. I had a friend once and we were out shopping, she got a phone call on her cell phone that her friend’s brother had a baby girl. I remember her stopping and crying about how happy she was. I remember thinking at the time. WTF? She is crying over a baby….

And then I became a soldier’s wife followed up very quickly by becoming a mom!
I mean I cry and get emotional over everything I try so hard sometimes. Like when we baptized my son Luca the past fall… As you know my parents are divorced and my mom has a new man in her life that she has since moved in with. My dad asked at the baptism if we could take of photo of just us … Me and Ben the kids, my brother and my mom and dad. I lost my sh** I could not stop I ruined the photos even
It so funny all the things that get to me now I cry over my own books, and at almost every single movie it does not matter what it is I find something sad. I just was sitting here thinking as I read a Memorial Day email and suddenly felt the tears rolling down my cheeks as I read that freedom isn’t free…. I guess it is okay to cry right??

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